OK, so Now I'm thinking either really low milage 2nd gen or maybe a 3rd gen?
within those years are there best options model as far as reliability & off roading?
What models have the most luxury?
Its gonna be a manual trans for sure....
That leads you to a conflict right there.
Without question, the most reliable & cheapest to maintain engine is the 3.0L H6, as available in the '01-'09. Virtually no head gasket problems, no timing belt expense every 105k, and piles of smooth power available. Premium fuel recommended for towing/high load conditions, regular ok otherwise.
But... that gorgeous beast of an engine was never offered in combination with a manual trans.
The '05-'09 XT has the STI turbo engine, which also avoids the head gasket nasties of the base 2.5L engine. However, being a high performance turbo engine it does involve more expensive maintenance and once it does need rebuilding it will be a pricey rebuild. Available with manual and Limited trim in model years '05-'09. XTs got a few other goodies that didn't make it into any trim level with any other engine. Best power, worst MPG, premium fuel required period.
The base 2.5L engine is a decent engine with unfortunate head gasket leaks. Not every car will develop these, but quite a few have. Available with Limited trim and manual trans for '00-'05 only, manual option discontinued with MY06 onwards. Least horsepower, best MPG. The head gasket issue can be managed if you know what you're about. Once the car has the good new steel gaskets installed, you're probably set for life.
cars101.com for further details.
Also worth pointing out that all of the manual-trans cars '00-09 have almost identical VTD AWD systems. Traction-wise they are all about the same. The '07-09 XT adds VDC, Subaru's electronic stability control system. Great for higher speed travel on dirt/ice but it gets in your way for slow careful climbing/descending when you are very off road.
It's still possible to find new-old-stock aftermarket goodies for the '05-09, but they're going fast. Already gone for the 2nd gen cars but there are used ones to be had.
With your list of requirements I'd be looking for a 2004 2.5i Limited 5MT or a 2007-2009 XT Limited 5MT. The latter are highly sought after and fetch a pretty penny.